1. |
Angels
00:32
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2. |
Last Time You’ll See Me
03:00
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It was 1943, she sat at the vanity, and positioned her best cloche hat. Walking hand in hand,but couldn’t even stand, no they wouldn’t dare look eye to eye. She stood at the platform, at her man in uniform as he boarded to far off lands. And when the train began to go he stuck his head out the window, and kissed his love goodbye. With a heart full of fear, she’s back at the make-up mirror, wondering when she’ll see him again.
If we meet again we’re lucky. So let’s make this moment count. Cuz there are no guarantees except, one day the lights go out. Let the kids out live their parents. Let them learn each day unharmed. Let the lovers hold each other til they part at the Great Wall.
It was 2013, in full on mom jeans, she watched the kids climb on the bus. With his lego back-pack, paper lunch sack and a smile to go with it all. As the bus pulled away he opened the window to say, I love you mom so very much. But she didn’t quite hear, with headphones in her ears, her crime podcast wouldn’t allow. Now she waits for a call, one she fears most of all, did her boy survive the fired shots.
If we meet again we’re lucky. So let’s make this moment count. Cuz there are no guarantees except, one day the lights go out. Let the kids out live their parents. Let them learn each day unharmed. Let the lovers hold each other til they part at the Great Wall.
Hug and kiss the ones every chance you get. A life without “I loves you’s” is a life full of regret. If we meet again we’re lucky but there’s six sides to a dice. So hold on to your horseshoes, cuz god’s not always nice and if we meet again we’re lucky but we’ll never meet again. So goodbye I’ll love you til the end.
If we meet again we’re lucky. So let’s make this moment count. Cuz there are no guarantees except, one day the lights go out. Let the kids out live their parents. Let them learn each day unharmed. Let the lovers hold each other til they part at the Great Wall. They part at the Great Wall. They part at the Great Wall.
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3. |
Never Could
03:28
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4. |
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I heard your name cuz Hollywood is small. Right now it’s on fire, the flames are growing tall. I miss you a little more each day. You know how cold New York gets, you know I wish you’d stay and tell me all your secrets, I have to know. I’d really like to see you, one more time before you go, go, go, go, go… you go.
Tell me this, did you ever care? Your eyes used to give me answers, I’m left with a blank stare. There’s a time when breathe becomes air. The long road ahead must end some- where do you keep your secrets? I have to know. I’d really like to see you, one more time before you go, go, go, go, go. Go, go, go, go, go. Go, go, go, go, go. Before you go, go, go, go, go- you go.
Go, go, go, go, go, go…
Hollywood’s still burning, and I can taste the smoke. Ashes in the air that make me start to choke. You’re still in the city, trying to keep warm. And I still have your jacket, while you fight off the snowstorms.
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5. |
Pennies from ’98
03:14
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Blown out candle say goodbye to your intentions not to mention everything it cost. Church lined roads lead me somewhere find me there gripping a cross. Don’t know much follow my hunches taking punches for all that you’ve done. Late arrival to your late night reservations on probation more like prohibition.
Only psychos sleep with their socks on. Only rebels read the news. Only outcasts play the pawn. Only lovers only few…
Look for pennies from the year I was born. Who knows what any of this means anymore? We’ll sit at the back booth and watch the front door. Expecting you to enter but you don’t.
Trained hard to run the races tied up laces how to compete? Brilliant babies hugged by mothers all the others swallow defeat. Since I met you time goes slower growing closer to what I set out. Lately the clock’s been ticking faster real disaster starts only as doubt.
Only psychos sleep with their socks on. Only rebels read the news. Only outcasts play the pawn. Only lovers only few…
Look for pennies from the year I was born. Who knows what any of this means anymore? We’ll sit at the back booth and watch the front door. Expecting you to enter but you don’t.
And I’ll look for you when I close my eyes, hand on my shoulder saying goodbye. Sit at the back booth and try not to cry. Expecting you to enter but you, don’t.
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6. |
B.S. Poetry
03:54
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You write poems about me in the notes on your phone
In bougie coffee shops where you can’t afford the scones
You think that you’re so clever with your metaphors and similes
But I see right through you and your bull shit poetry
You wanna take me dancing because you’re so romantic
You say that for me you’d swim the whole Atlantic
Or walk 500 miles like you heard in that song
But I see right through you, I’m not a girl who plays along
I used to drink the kool aid, life is sweet when you’re naive
I actually believed you when you said you’d never leave
But time is the best teacher, it makes you grow up pretty fast
I can’t be with you if there’s one thing I learned from the past
Some nights I think about you, this fantasy inside my head
You come to my apartment, and I push you onto the bed
But it’s not a bed it’s actually a trap door
You fall down and down where you can’t bother me no more
On occasion I bump into you on the street
“We’re having lovely weather, the L.A. weather you can’t beat”
We have nothing left to say still we give it the college try
“Yes it’s a pretty day there’s not a cloud in the sky”
We run in the same circles, you run circles around me
That’s why it’s no surprise when I see you at my friend’s party
You say you’d love to take me for a coffee sometime
You might even buy me scones you’ve been saving up your dimes
Fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you, fuck you
You, you
Fuck you, fuck you
And fuck your poetry too
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7. |
So Sweetly
03:21
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Punished by God for fashion faux pas. Eating with elbows on the table. And I’m so fucking drained. Cute underwear all period stained. To all the girls that hide behind their hair, I care.
Praised you for just barely the bare minimum. Basic respect for women, way to go. And you act all appalled, when we’re walking and I get cat-called. Then go back to reading “Infinite Jest.” I digress.
If I die with dishes piled high. If I drop dead on our unmade bed. Will they say I never, will they say I never, will they say I never cleaned up my act?
When I barge through the golden gates oh I can’t wait to see, the stripper factories and endless jellybeans. I can already hear the angels singing just for me, all the songs for sluts so sweetly.
Classy girls have the best posture. Smile even when they’re fucking pissed. You used to laugh at me, said “You’re so cute when you get angry.” Well these days, I am angry all the time, but say, “I’m fine.”
Good guys post pictures with their mothers. Nine times out of ten, it’s just a flex. I’m starting to believe, god’s just a flying spaghetti, it’s time we get a room all of our own. LEAVE ME ALONE.
Scolded for the laundry left unfolded. Failed because the chipped paint on my nails. And I will never ever, I will never, I will never ever let them win this one.
When I barge through the golden gates oh I can’t wait to see, the stripper factories and endless jellybeans. I can already hear the angels singing just for me. All the songs for sluts so sweetly. All the songs for sluts so sweetly. The angels do agree, it’s best to be slutty. All the songs for sluts so sweetly.
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8. |
Interlude
02:33
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Justice was my greatest teacher. Got close but could never reach her. Stuck out my hand all I felt was air. Were you even ever really there?
You were the one I thought I knew so well. Used to jump in puddles before I fell. Now I float in the moat that surrounds your door. I once lived there, I could have sworn.
You told me stories fact or fiction. They felt true but their contradictions - make labyrinths out of mole hills. I keep on digging, but never will-
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9. |
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Four months passed since I’d seen you. There was catching up to do. I picked the place we’d meet at noon. You wrote great I’ll see you soon. We sat down and ordered some food. I listened to what you’d been up to. Oh good lord it’s tragic but so true. I used to really love you now I’m so bored by you. I could hardly believe what on earth had I once seen? There you sat across from me just as boring as can be. When you left, oh how I cried. Sitting here, I think I’d rather die. I can’t help asking myself why - I’d be more entertained watching wet paint dry! You’re ruled by your god. I’m ruled by the moon. Thank them both it’s over but I didn’t think it’d end so soon. You wouldn’t be so boring, if you just let people in. I still have your jacket and you, you’re just left with me under your skin. I walked you to your car who knew a block could be so far you pointed there said “This one’s me.” “I remember”, I said softly. You held me close, one last time. Then asked if I needed a ride. “I’ll take the train, I’ll be just fine.” And when I walked away I realized. Fuck. I’d rather be bored and have you by my side.
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10. |
First Time I Died
05:39
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I flip through photos admiring the way we once were. Lately life has become one constant blur. I’m hoping we’ll find a way to make an impact. These are the facts of life, you can’t argue with facts.
You sell all the things that you have or you give them away. Except the newspaper clippings that I have saved. they tell me you’re in motion pictures they say you’re a star. But I know who you are yes I know who you are.
Sooner or later we’ll all forget Marilyn Monroe. King tut was nearly a shadow from long long ago. You make your mark on the world but it just fades away. All we have now is today all we have is today.
Everyone dies more than once the Egyptians did say. You finally go the last time someone utters your name. I don’t want to go, I was hoping to stay. Your bed feels warm while the world grows colder each day.
My time with you is eternal but always cut short. You kiss me hello and goodbye at a different airport. I have to do the things I was sent here to do, but that just means less time with you so much less time with you.
Sooner or later we’ll all forget Marilyn Monroe. King tut was nearly a shadow from long long ago. You make your mark on the world but it just fades away. All we have now is today all we have is today.
She worked from nine to five. He paid the bills til he forgot he was alive. They saved their pennies for a rainy day, but the rain never came.
Sooner or later we’ll all forget Marilyn Monroe. King tut was nearly a shadow from long long ago. You make your mark on the world but it just fades away. All we have now is today all we have is today.
All we have now is today all we have is today. All we have now is today all we have is today. All we have now is today all we have is today. all we have now is today all we have is today.
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Taylor Blackwell Los Angeles, California
Singer and multi-instrumentalist. Member of band the tenth. Debut solo album, “In Memory of Haroldine”, produced by Sharp/Shock’s Davey Warsop, featuring Fin Argus. out now.
Taylor Blackwell recommends:
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